As you all have probably heard by now, Dave Letterman shocked the shit out of his live audience last night by going on air and admitting to extramarital affairs with members of his staff.
Letterman, who was being extorted by an alleged employee of the illustrious news program '48 Hours,' apparently had sex with his personal assistant Stephanie Birkitt.
One of the perks of Birkitt's employment, according to Gawker, was a paid education at Yeshiva University Law School. I'm gonna take that to mean that there's no law school debt in Birkitt's baggage. The Internet is alive with the "who cares" reactions this morning, but I'm just waiting to see deferred associates weigh in with "WHY HER?!?! WHY NOT ME?!?!?"